Musings

Rick Santorum Is Satan

January 9, 2012

Ever hear of this guy, Rick Santorum? Well, if you haven’t, he’s a Republican, and a former senator from Pennsylvania, serving from 1995 to 2007. He’s a social and political conservative, and at the moment, he’s a candidate for President of the United States, scrabbling for position against Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, and Ron Paul, who seem to be the most serious (if that’s an applicable term here) of the remaining possibilities for the nomination. One other thing, though, that you should know about Rick Santorum. He’s just about, hands down, the biggest outright asshole piece of shit you could ever hope to meet. The kind of scum that you wipe off the bottom of your shoe but can’t get rid of the stench of, this guy is.

Santorum has another meaning, at least among those in the know. You see, the former senator is really, really stringently anti-gay. He’s said that if he gets elected, he’ll dissolve all gay marriages that have already taken place in this country, and he’ll reinstitute Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. He’s the guy who said, and I’m quoting here, “Every society in the history of man has upheld the institution of marriage as a bond between a man and a woman…. In every society, the definition of marriage has not ever to my knowledge included homosexuality. That’s not to pick on homosexuality. It’s not, you know, man on child, man on dog, or whatever the case may be. It is one thing. And when you destroy that you have a dramatic impact on the quality”. Of course, he later claimed that he hadn’t been trying to equate gay sex with pedophilia and  bestiality, but Dan Savage, of “Savage Love,” ran a contest to determine a new meaning for “santorum,” one befitting the closed minded former senator’s viewpoint. Thus, santorum came to mean “the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex.” Sounds about right to me! Santorum is also, and this should come as no surprise, in favor of teaching intelligent design in school, and he’s against abortion in just about any scenario, even when pregnancy was the result of incest or rape. The man himself has seven children, so it’s safe to say he’s against birth control also.

Here’s where it gets interesting. In the Iowa caucus that just took place, Mitt Romney finished ahead by a nose, but it was Santorum who came in a surprising second, after surging in the polls over a period of days. He’s still in the running, especially with South Carolina coming up. South Carolina, and I should know this from having lived there for a year, is extremely conservative. Many of the citizens there might not feel that Romney is conservative enough, being too centrist. That could mean that Santorum would be given a real shot in the arm, and could be a legitimate threat to Romney. I don’t really see it happening, if for no other reason than in some of the other states, there will be Republicans who think Santorum is too conservative, and that Romney, being more moderate, is the way to go. It would really suck if Romney got elected, but it would be infinitely worse if somehow, some way, Santorum got into the White House. There’s not a whole lot that would make me expatriate, but that would probably do it. The man is the most hateful piece of garbage you can imagine. Whatever else his values might be (I’ll choose not to even get started on teaching kids creationism, because if I do I’ll be going all night), the fact that he is so opposed to gay marriage alone should disqualify him from being fit to lead. I just can’t understand why anyone could have that viewpoint. It’s nothing but bigotry, pure and simple. Here are two men, or two women, who presumably love each other and want to be with each other, and they want their love to be recognized. And here comes somebody like Santorum, in a position of power, a public figure whom people listen to, who says that they shouldn’t be allowed to do that. Why? What’s the logic? It’s not like the people who are trying to get married are intruding on Santorum’s life in any way. But he’s intruding on theirs; he’s trying to deny them what should be a basic freedom, and he’ll make it a priority to do so if he’s elected. Same thing with abortions. Here’s a woman who has something going on with her body, and you’ve got a politician like Santorum who’s trying to tell her that she doesn’t have a choice in the matter because life begins at conception. I don’t know about anyone else, but I don’t even really care if life begins at conception or not. Until such time as the child can no longer be safely aborted, it should remain the mother’s decision, if for no other reason than because overpopulation is a serious problem. I think there’s a lot more wrong with a guy like Santorum, frankly, with his seven children! What the hell do you need that many kids for? Are you trying to start a private army? Although with this guy, that’s probably not all that farfetched. Moving on…

Look, if you’ve been reading my posts for the past four years, you know that I’m an unapologetic liberal. I don’t disagree with everything that every Republican presidential candidate says. I have grave misgivings about some of Obama’s policies, particularly his out of control entitlement spending and seeming inability to slash the budget. But it goes without saying that I’d prefer the current Commander in Chief over any of the wolves climbing the hill, and that goes triple for Santorum. He’s not just unlikeable, he’s dangerous. He doesn’t need to be in politics at all, much less aspiring toward the highest post in our government. So anyone reading this, even if you don’t vote for Obama, have some common sense. If somehow Santorum edges Romney, put a stop to this. Better to not vote at all than to put a scumbag like this in the position where he can implement some of his crazy, wrongheaded policies.

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